Tuesday, March 11, 2008

First Love...


    Recently I've been scanning some vintage family photos I borrowed from my Mom and I came across this treasure mixed in with a collection tucked in an old shoebox. Having never owned a camera until a short time ago the only pictures I have are the ones people have given me along the way, vacation shots, my nieces, wedding photos (not mine) etc. It's a photo of my first love "Sally"(my sister is the fox on the left). I had not seen a picture of  "Sally" in quite a few years and seeing it brought back a stream of memories and thoughts associated with "first love". (Hey wait a sec, is it OK to post pictures of your ex-girlfriend on the interweb ?... oh yeah I think I remember seeing something...).
    I can recall the exact moment the mania called love started. A buddy of mine was dating her sister and they asked me if I wanted to come over and play some cards with them. I'll refrain from going into all the mushy details but there was just something the way her eyes lit up when she laughed... I was hooked. We both agreed that we didn't want to become one of those couples that kept breaking up and getting back together but that's exactly what we became. When it was good it was perfect but when it was bad it really wasn't very good... and that's putting it mildly.
    I was 22 years old and pretty much thought I new everything by now... seriously. I had never been in love but I thought when it wasn't working between two people you agreed, as adults, to just go your separate ways. Boy was I wrong. The first time we split up I remember sitting in a friends car and I pulled out a picture of her that I had in my wallet. Looking at that picture I felt physically ill and actually gagged, I had never felt pain like that ever... excruciating. Richard Pryor had a bit where he said that's the moment you receive you diploma to manhood, I think he may be right. 
   I've never been diagnosed bi-polar or manic depressive but I think that's what being in love can be like. The highs way too high and the lows way too low, only there's no medication to take except copious amounts of alcohol...but that only works for about six months to a year. It can be in this exact "first love" condition that people often need to make the most important decision of their lives... to get married. We eventually went our separate ways,"Sally" married somebody else and I never recovered (I'm kidding...or not). It's hard to not look back sometimes and think "what if " but like Dad said,"If the dog didn't stop to poop(shit) he would have caught the rabbit." What the heck does that even mean ?


This song really doesn't have anything to do with anything I just like it...

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